Donald Trump is at it yet again on Twitter this morning, and this time it really looks like he’s gone off the deep end.
Of course, everything that Donald Trump graces Twitter with is an absolute dumpster fire. But this morning, he’s mad at airplanes. You didn’t read that wrong. And no, I’m not kidding. The big orange guy with all the power is pitching a fit about airplanes.
According to his tweet this morning, Trump feels that those big, metal, bird machines that fly all the people through the air are just too complex for him to wrap his brain around. In fact, if you ask him, they’re just too darn tricky to even fly anymore. Yeah, he’s an over-inflated reality TV washup with one too many connections to Russia and about as much knowledge on aviation as I have in nuclear physics. But we never doubted he’d have an opinion on it all the same.
After making a nice blanket statement about airplanes being too big for his brain, he proceeded to completely dig his hole of stupidity by essentially ranting about the disadvantages of progress within the world of aviation. Evidently, according to the big guy, we should stick to the “old and simpler” ways. You know, when racism was rampant, women were objectified for the kicks of men, and airplanes didn’t hurt his brain.
Airplanes are becoming far too complex to fly. Pilots are no longer needed, but rather computer scientists from MIT. I see it all the time in many products. Always seeking to go one unnecessary step further, when often old and simpler is far better. Split second decisions are….
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) March 12, 2019
….needed, and the complexity creates danger. All of this for great cost yet very little gain. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want Albert Einstein to be my pilot. I want great flying professionals that are allowed to easily and quickly take control of a plane!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) March 12, 2019
But nevertheless, progress marched on without the permission of the toddler in chief. So, his tender feelings were bruised this morning as he decided that flying a plane would require a “computer scientist from MIT” and it seems he suddenly realized that he is not one.
According to our president that knows diddly about computers, science, computer science, or airplanes — those pesky MIT grads are “Always seeking to go one unnecessary step further.” He thinks that flying takes a certain finesse — That split-second decisions are crucial and all of this “complexity” just creates too much danger. Because, of course, all those fine folks with actual degrees and training don’t know that? Okay.
But in the end, like most everything else, it really comes down to the money, honey. For Trump, anyway. All of this flyin’ business, that’s effectively given him an early morning nose bleed from all the thinking and whatnot, just costs too much damn money. And because he’s unable to see or comprehend the advantages or leaping gains of progress in such a field, he thinks that all that green is going out with no gain.
And to top it off, in case you were curious this morning, Donald Trump doesn’t want Albert Einstein piloting his next flight. Nevermind that he was a genius. Or, you know, he’s dead. Trump doesn’t want him in the cockpit, or anyone comparable to Einstein either, apparently. Instead, he wants a nice white guy in a uniform that’s going to smile at him with a mouth full of shiny, frat boy teeth and say things like, “Honor to meet you, Mr. President,” and “Hold on to your toupée, Mr. Trump, the turbulence is fixin’ to get tricky.”
We’re not sure what he’s been smoking this morning, but it’s hard to dispute that he’s riding some sort of crazy train. It’s really no wonder he’s been accused of drug use in the past. And after a morning of tweets like this, we suspect those accusations will be making a hard and fast comeback.
All I can say is — buses, boats, trains, and automobiles — beware. Evidently, Trump is on a warpath for the transportation industry. There’s a damn good chance that you’re up next.
Featured image via DC Tribune Library
